Unlike Dumbo, which was the last big remake/reimagining of an old Disney property, I don’t have much of an attachment to the original Aladdin, despite being at the perfect age for it to be my thing like it was for a lot of my peers during Disney’s renaissance in the late 80s to mid 90s. It’s a perfectly fun and serviceable adventure with good songs, but it is – at the end of the day – a product of its time, which means that it is full of questionable choices made all throughout the film that stereotype and fetishize Arabic imagery and reducing Islamic history to mere aesthetics. So, while the idea of remaking Aladdin might initially seem like a terrible and misguided idea, there is potential to do something interesting.

Which makes it too bad because that’s not what they did.

I’m not sure where to start, so I’ll begin with my biggest curiosity going into the film – Guy Ritchie as the the director. A choice so baffling, I was eagerly awaiting to see what he would bring to this, especially given that the central character is a thief, and Ritchie has made a name for making movies about “street rats.” Unfortunately, despite initial reports of Ritchie’s approach to John August’s script being very “ambitious, nontraditional, and non-linear,” the film is utterly lifeless. Ritchie’s distinct kinetic style and energy, which made his recent not-very-good King Arthur movie at least somewhat interesting, is completely gone here, which is strange considering one of Aladdin’s greatest elements was its intensely energetic animation. If I hadn’t known he was behind the camera, I never would’ve guessed, and assumed Disney hired a more standard, workman director.

Like with most of these Disney remakes of old classics, there is an attempt to make the outdated elements more palatable for a modern audience, which makes sense for the Brand™, I suppose. For Aladdin, most of it involves giving Jasmine (Naomi Scott) more agency and ambition. Here, she wants to be the next Sulton of Agrabah, taking over after her father (Navid Negahban), but traditions keep her from doing that. Instead, she is constantly being forced to deal with suitors including one shoehorned white guy in the form of Billy Magnussen as Prince Anders. If you think the film might be hinting at some modern political parallels with Jasmine, don’t worry, they’ll hit you over the head in a later scene where Jafar (Marwan Kenzari) is talking to the Sulton, and trying to make an argument for Agrabah to be less of a peaceful trading place to a more military oriented superpower that can keeps its walls and borders safe from invaders. It’s a movie for kids, so I’m wasn’t expecting subtlety anyway, but even then…wow.

Jasmine also gets a best friend, a handmaiden named Dalia (Nasim Pedrad), but she is only just there to be a love interest for the Genie (Will Smith)…because, I guess the Genie just needed to have a love interest for some reason. There is some extra character work to pad out the runtime to two hours and eight minutes, but much of it comes off as redundant and unnecessary, although there is the addition of a new song for Jasmine called “Speechless” that is quite good, even if the style of the song didn’t totally fit along with the previously established songs. Even Jafar is more fleshed out, revealing a compelling backstory that I think could work had the film explored it more in the second half and perhaps adjusted the story so that it fits the new material more instead of feeling obligated to stick with the original plot.

The performances are largely fine. I don’t think the actors are given particularly great material, but a good chunk of them are charismatic enough to make it work. Will Smith is the biggest standout, which should say a lot because he’s not a very good singer at all. Thankfully, the moments where he is forced to channel the late great Robin Williams’ manic comic energy is kept few and far between, relying more on his easy going charm and effortlessly likeable presence. His performance is very comparable to something like Hitch more than anything else, and it totally works for the character. Although, I’m not entirely sure how to feel about the fact that casting Smith in the role turns the Genie into a very literal example of the magical negro trope. The other standout is Naomi Scott, who has been a recent rising star that has earned a big break, and while I wish it was in a better movie, she does a wonderful job showcasing her range and vocal talent here. If anything, this should establish her a bonafide star.

Oh, I just realized I haven’t even mentioned our title character, who is played by relative newcomer, Mena Massoud. Massoud gets a few moments that allow him to play up the charm, and an early sequence where he shows up in the palace as Prince Ali in hopes of seeing Jasmine again, he shows some solid comedic timing and some really good dance moves in a later scene. However, aside from those few moments, he doesn’t get much of a chance to be as expressive and – for a lack of a better term – animated as he could’ve been. He’s just there, staged in awkward ways, and in all likelihood, uncomfortable with all the green screen work and reactions to CG characters that he has to do.

I appreciate the diversity in front of the camera, but that same level of diversity is hardly reflected behind the camera. Because the major creative forces behind the film are white, the film lacks the specificity that can bring a different angle to the story. Disney obviously recognize the need to cast appropriately for the most part, but the culture of Agrabah as presented is still a bizarre mishmash of designs taken from influences ranging from the Middle East to Northern Africa to South Asia, and it’s all primarily designed through a white lens like the animated film. I’d like to think that if filmmakers of Arabic background were attached the results would yield something more interesting, and probably wouldn’t have found itself in situations like coming under fire for darkening up white background extras.

Despite this, I wouldn’t call Aladdin some kind of train wreck or anything like that. It’s just so painfully uninspired and bland film that my mind can’t help but wander and think about some of the deeper, more insidious implications that will likely fly over the heads of most viewers. It’s too long, it lacks energy and style, and some of the interesting ideas on paper are not given the attention required to be explored deeper for the actors, who are all clearly trying their absolute best. There are moments here and there that brought a smile to my face, especially when Will Smith was allowed to be Will Smith, but like with a lot of these remakes from Disney, it simply reminded me that I could easily just watch a superior version of the same story in the original, which – even as a non-fan – was filled with so much more life and vibrancy and personality in every frame than there is in this entire movie. I’m sure the kids will like it, though.